


New Beginnings

by ChangeForTheBetter



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Post-Season/Series 05
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-05
Updated: 2016-09-05
Packaged: 2018-08-13 06:48:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,529
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7966672
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChangeForTheBetter/pseuds/ChangeForTheBetter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's not easy returning from the dead.  A story about love and healing post-Underworld.</p>
            </blockquote>





	New Beginnings

**Author's Note:**

> Written at the end of season 5A, so some details about their time in the Underworld are off.
> 
> This was originally a gift for unbreakableauri, as part of the 2015 Captain Swan Secret Santa.

It was late afternoon when their rag tag group returned from the Underworld. Everyone spent the first minutes back in Storybrooke, Maine just blinking, as their eyes adjusted to the crisp bright day. Snow, Regina, and Robin Hood headed for the nursery, Mr. Gold to his shop, and David promised Henry a warm cup of hot cocoa at Granny’s.

By unspoken agreement, Emma and Killian parted ways from the group to head to their new home. He paused a moment while closing the white picket gate behind them, stroking his fingers over the wood and turning so he could see the entire house. “I remember picking it out now,” he said quietly.

“You did a good job." 

He continued as if he hadn’t heard her, but laced his fingers with hers as they walked up the short pathway and through the front door. “Near the sheriff’s station, and close to Henry’s school, a good sized yard if he wants to practice sword fighting, and I thought you would like the big windows.”

He looked at the telescope in the corner and she picked up his train of thought. “A view of the sea- good for the both of us, hm?”

“You must have done all the decorating then, right love?” he asked as he wrapped an arm around her shoulders. 

Emma nodded. “It still has a ways to go - but would you like me to give you the full tour?”

She smiled brightly up at him and it was left unspoken that this was not his first visit. Memories of their earlier interactions in the house flashed behind both of their eyes, but were quickly pushed aside. 

“Here’s the downstairs bathroom – nothing special. In here is the den. I put in some bookshelves because it looks cozy and all your books and scrolls from the Jolly Roger will need somewhere to go. The television is set up with Netflix, On Demand, and DVR – well, Henry or I will have to explain that stuff to you later…”

As they moved through the house their hands remained clasped together, only separating for her to tug on the hem of his jacket, or so that he could run fingers through the ends of her hair. The separation was too fresh to ignore just yet, so they stood too close and reached out for each other.

_I’m here. You’re here._

_I’m here. We’re here._

_It’s okay._

“And here’s the dining room. I got a big table because I figured we would just eat in the kitchen normally. This would be more for holiday dinners and things, when the whole family gets together.”

“Everyone? I look forward to that evening,” Killian grinned mischievously, and she answered with a snort.

“Yeah, tell me about it. All I know is _I’m_ not going to be responsible for cooking. I’ll let my mom have free run of the kitchen, to save us all – speaking of which… Ta-da! The kitchen.” No sooner had she gestured around the cabinets and counters, then Emma’s stomach let out a loud growl. 

Killian chuckled, “Time for dinner, I suppose.” 

“That’s fine, but there’s nothing in these cabinets except rum,” Emma frowned. “Dark Ones not needing to eat and all… And I don’t know about you, but I’m not quite in the mood for celebrations at Granny’s?” He shook his head in reply. “I guess take out it is then. I’ll call up Pizza Planet.”

* * *

 Twenty minutes later, Emma tipped the delivery boy - “Thanks Sid. Keep the change.” -and plunked the box down on their kitchen table. There was a long, companionable silence over the sounds of chewing and the soft thumps of their feet bumping under the chairs. When their bellies were full and their glasses half empty, she braced her elbows on the table.

“So, how are you holding up? I know saying goodbye to Liam again couldn’t have been easy…”

Killian smiled reassuringly, though he didn’t hide the tint of sadness as he stared back into the rum. “That’s true. It was good to see him again. There was a time when he was the only family I had…” He looked up and placed his hand over hers. “But that’s not the case anymore. And if you don’t mind, I’d prefer to spend my first day back in the land of the living, well, _living,_ rather than dwelling on past sorrows.”

He was avoiding this and she knew it, but he wasn’t avoiding _her_ , so she let the conversation drop for the moment. It’s not like anyone would expect it to be simple to cope with dying and reuniting with loved ones in the Underworld, only to be surprised by a seemingly impossible rescue by your True Love. It would take some time, but Emma didn’t mind waiting. They were in this for the long haul- together.

“Fair enough. Want to see what’s on Netflix?”

A child-like excitement came back to his face, and she couldn’t have stopped her answering grin if she tried.

They did it right- popping the popcorn and pulling out a blanket, getting everything comfortable before switching off the lights and settling in for the movie. They chose Anastasia- mostly Emma’s choice because Killian was unfamiliar with the overwhelming number of titles and images.

“I haven’t seen this one in ages- I think since I ran away actually. It used to be one of my favorites as a kid.”

He tucked her in closer to his chest with the blanket when she sniffled through ‘Journey to the Past,’ and she stole more popcorn as he stared transfixed by the perilous train crash scene and Anya’s cursed nightmares. Emma fell asleep at some point, but woke when Killian clenched his hand around her shoulder as Dmitri decided to leave upon realizing Anya’s true identity. She smoothed a hand over his and smiled, already knowing the happy ending, but enjoying his reactions. 

At the end of the movie, he turned to her with a warm smile and placed a soft kiss on her forehead. “Excellent movie, Swan. I can see why it was your favorite- very fitting.”

“It’s a little crazy how my life has followed such a similar path. I could never have known it then, but now it’s like all my childhood wishes came true – the real life fairytale.” She smiled hesitantly, as if barely believing her luck, and she leaned closer to her pirate.

“But even fairytale princesses need to sleep. Don’t think I didn’t notice that you dozed off in the middle there…”

“You’re ri-iiaaahhh-ght,” she said, interrupted mid-sentence by a yawn. “I guess that trip to the Underworld took more out of me than I thought.”

“Adrenaline can keep you going for a while, but you need your rest. It’s all over now.”

“Mmmm,” she mumbled her agreement against his collarbone. “Time for bed.”

Killian smiled in fond amusement as she showed no sign of moving, despite her words. “Shall I carry you then?”

That got her to sit up, if only to shoot him a sarcastic glare while he laughed.

They tidied up and both went upstairs under their own power. As Emma finished brushing her teeth and getting changed in the bathroom, Killian took off the brace for his hook and slipped into the large bed. He wondered if Emma might balk at the intimacy of actually sleeping together at night, so he carefully laid on his half of the bed, facing away to give her space. He needn’t have worried, because seconds after the lights switched off, there was a warm arm around his waist, tugging his body as close as possible. He turned back to face her and offered his left shoulder as a more comfortable pillow, which Emma accepted with a smile and a quick kiss to the center of his chest. 

No more than five minutes later, she was asleep in his arms, breaths gusting softly across his neck, but Killian still lay awake. He hadn’t felt tired when they returned from their epic journey; there was a kind of nervous energy running beneath his skin. Somewhere in the back of his mind he recognized the feeling.

He was waiting for the other shoe to drop.

It had happened when Emma first showed an interest in seriously starting a relationship with him- those quiet thoughts that soon she would realize who he was and she’d leave. How could a hero ever love him after the things he’d done? But he had squashed those fears. _She_ had squashed those fears. He looked down at her peacefully sleeping face and counted his lucky stars. She had stayed by his side and given him the strength to be the man he always wanted to be. She had faith in him, she forgave him, and she came back for him even when it meant going through hell itself. The love he had for this woman outweighed anything he’d ever felt – True Love, apparently. And she felt the same way about him.

…It just didn’t feel real sometimes. It was beyond belief.

As the minutes and hours ticked by, he wrestled with his thoughts and fears and the desperate flickering hope in the middle of his chest that he wanted to protect but was afraid to give more fuel lest it consume him. He was starting his Happy Ending with Emma, a normal life- well as normal as one could have in Storybrooke- and he was both thrilled and terrified. He had to stop himself from laughing aloud at the irony of facing the same fears that he had soothed in Emma back in Camelot.

A hitch in Emma’s breathing beside him caught his attention. When he looked to his side again, there was a fitful expression on her face, eyes clenched tightly shut. As his own heartbeat started racing in his chest for no reason, he realized she was having a nightmare.

At the same moment that he reached his hand up to soothe her, Emma jolted awake with a gasp. “Killian, no!”

 “Shhhh, shhh, I’m here love. I’m right here.”

“Killian!” The desperate fear faded from her eyes as awareness of her surroundings trickled in, but tears still welled up. “I saw you dying again,” she whispered, tracing her hands over his neck and chest where there had once been gaping wounds. “I couldn’t save you.”

“It’s okay. You did save me. I’m alive, right here, and my heart will be beating as long as yours will.” He took her hand to place it right over their matching heartbeats. “I’m never going to leave you again.”

_This is real_ , he remembered. _I chose her and she chose me and nothing will keep us apart._

They clung to each other and cried until they both fell asleep.

* * *

 The morning was surprisingly natural. Killian woke first, as the sun started to peek in through the curtains. He shifted to sit up, but didn’t leave the bed. He didn’t want Emma to panic when she woke and he was gone, but the more selfish side of him also wanted to savor this moment, the quiet warmth and the way seconds seemed drawn out like drops of honey. Picking up the small pad of paper and pencil on the nightstand, he passed time trying to capture the way Emma’s hair became a halo in the early light.

He was focused intently on drawing the perfect lightness of her eyelashes on her cheek when he looked back to find her green eyes staring back at him. “Good morning.”

“Good morning.” He’d have to start all over again because that curl of a smile was the best thing he’d ever seen and needed to be immortalized.

“God, sometimes this just doesn’t feel real,” she sighed.

The pencil halted its scratches as he turned to stare at her. Of course she’d say the exact same thing he’d been thinking until the early hours of the morning. “I know how you feel.” Killian tried to say it light-heartedly but it came out more serious than he expected. 

“Okay,” she sat up with sudden resolve. “We have two problems and one solution.”

“Pardon? What problems now?”

“One, I’m very new to this whole domestic life thing and it’s weird. Two, we don’t have coffee and that is frankly unacceptable. We’re going grocery shopping- put some clothes on.”

 Just to get another one of those wry smiles, he pulled out his trademark devilish smirk, “Are you sure that’s what you want, love?”

Emma threw a pillow at his head and went to get dressed.

* * *

 One quick grocery run and two cups of coffee later, they were back in the kitchen, putting away the last boxes of crackers and pasta, when Killian turned to her. “Okay Swan, now that you’ve had your required caffeine, would you care to explain this master plan of yours more clearly?”

Emma’s face abruptly grew serious and she curled both hands around the mug for comfort. Slightly worried, Killian trailed his fingers softly along her upper arm, unspoken, yet understood- _Whatever it is, it’s fine. I’m not going anywhere._  

She sighed and carefully met his eyes before she began, “When I went down to the Underworld to get you back, I didn’t know what I was doing, if it would even work. All I knew was that I couldn’t let things be. Turning you into the Dark One was wrong, but it hasn’t changed since Camelot. I -” her voice broke, “I _couldn’t_ lose you. I wanted to try splitting my heart, but I didn’t think any farther than that- what if it worked? What if it didn’t? I couldn’t face it…but then it _did_ work. It worked and you came back, and I was so relieved!” She put down the mug to wrap her arms tightly around his waist and lean into him.

 “But it feels like a dream, you know?” she continued. “I saw you die. They took your body away and you were so cold…” His arms squeezed tightly around her and his chin tucked against her temple brought Emma back to the present. “And now you’re standing in front of me as if nothing ever happened. It’s almost too good to be true.”

“I was feeling the same way. I thought it was over, that I was ending my more than 300 years looking at you, and knowing you and your family were safe. And I was okay with that- I was lucky enough to meet you and have the time that we had. But now I get a second chance… It feels like I’ve gotten more chances than a man deserves, to turn away from being a villain, to become the man I wanted to be, and now to start a future with you.”

“And I don’t have the slightest idea how to do that…” she smiled up at him, but it was playful this time. “I’ve never done this before- settling down with a house, and saying ‘we’ and ‘ours.’ It’s hard to imagine that I could ever have a normal life, but I think given the circumstances, we should just _start_.”

“Live in the moment…” he mused, and the corner of her mouth curled up like there was some kind of inside joke.

 “Right. So this morning you’re going to learn how to make pancakes.” Emma stepped away to pull bowls and pans out of the cupboards. “Could you get the milk, oil, and eggs?”

 They bumped elbows and hips, moving through the same space, the contact more playful and affectionate than the physical reassurance of yesterday. She checked the heat of the pan and he added chocolate chips to the batter she had whisked together. She showed him how to pour just the right amount and let it form a smooth circle. He was in charge of flipping pancakes with the spatula – mostly because Emma wanted to enjoy the comedy of Killian’s first time flipping pancakes, but surprisingly he did very well. The surprise must have shown on her face because Killian flashed her a teasing grin. “Expected me to fail? Didn’t I tell you Emma? I’m quite talented with my one hand…”

His waggling eyebrows should have been ridiculous, but her heart rate picked up a little regardless. 

And he noticed, damn him. She knew he must have felt its other half beating in sync, as he widened his grin in complete delight. With spatula still in hand, he wrapped his left arm around her waist and dragged her into a heady kiss. There was a sweetness to it, an honest love behind the teasing, but still enough passion to leave her a little breathless. He paid attention to the way little nips made her pull tighter at his shirt collar, and savored the slow drag of their lips together. Emma couldn’t help but lick her lips a little as she pulled away.

“Okay, pirate. Don’t go burning our breakfast.”

Killian hummed agreeably and turned his attention back to the stove. “How about we go out sailing today when we’re finished? I need to bring back some things from the Jolly Roger after all.” 

“Sounds great.” As she set the table, Emma thought, _Yes. This must be what a future feels like._

* * *

Later on, the mid-morning sun shone clearly, tossing fragments of light on the crest of each wave rocking the Jolly Roger. Its heat took the bite out of the chilly Maine air, and made for an unseasonably warm day. As he watched Emma stand at the rail, wind ruffling the waves of her hair, Killian was struck again by how naturally she seemed to belong there. Since the first time he met her, he knew there was something special about Emma Swan. It was like his heart was reaching out for something familiar. _Oh, it’s you. It’s always been you._

He set the wheel to allow them to slowly drift, and joined her looking out at the sea.

In the past, he had imagined Liam still alive, sailing the Jolly with him just like when it was the Jewel of the Realm. He loved being accepted into the Charming family band of heroes, but he still wondered whether he could make his brother proud. And as in all happy moments of his life, he wished he simply could have Liam beside him. Meeting him in the Underworld was a blessing in disguise – it was painful to leave him, to be sure, but Killian felt that he finally had closure. He got to talk to his brother, he got to say goodbye… and Liam got to meet Emma. Liam knew straight away that Killian loved her, and he loved her too. _“She’s good for you, baby brother. She’ll keep you on your toes,” he’d grinned._

“I’m glad Liam got to meet you,” he finally said aloud to Emma.

She looked at him and laced their fingers together, sensing there was more he had to say.

“I’d told him about you, before you arrived. He wanted to know how I- how I died… I told him that I had become a villain after he died, and about Milah, and about how you changed it all- about how you reminded me that I could be a hero, that I could belong. We had a lot to catch up on,” he smiled, trying not to let the mood get too somber. “There have been moments over the years that I wished he was there to give me advice or to share my joys, and he finally got to hear about them. But most of all, I’m really glad that he got to meet you- it only seems right that my brother should meet the woman I love before we start our future together.” He kissed their joined hands with a bittersweet happiness brimming from his eyes. “He really liked you. I knew he would.” 

“So does that mean I have his blessing, then?” Emma joked.

Happy to lighten the mood, Killian played along, “Are you planning to propose to me, Swan?” He pulled a dramatic surprised face, and she pretended to think about it for a few moments.

“Hmmm I don’t know if I’ll ever be a traditional marriage vows kind of girl…” It was hard to keep a straight face when she saw his smile dim, but she continued, “seeing as I’ve already screwed up the ‘til death do us part’ bit.”

Then she let loose her face-splitting grin, and he gaped at her for a second. “You- You pirate!” he accused, pure joy and amusement in the word. “Trying to trick me…”

“Guilty,” replied Emma, and leaned in to steal a kiss.

It was slower and more tender than the one from the morning – a promise. When they parted, he looked at her fondly and traced a lock of hair behind her ear. “What is death in the face of True Love?”

“Death cannot stop True Love. All it can do is delay it for a while.”

“You’re quoting something again,” Killian said wryly.

“We are definitely watching the Princess Bride next time. You’ll love it.”

“As you wish.”

Emma laughs and wraps herself around him again.

**Author's Note:**

> Kudos to anyone who noticed the Toy Story reference! :)


End file.
